Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Difficult weekend

I'll be honest with you... it's been a difficult weekend. My lack of sleep and slight hormonal imbalance, mixed in with Mathieu's boredom (his friends were away) and general crankiness (from lack of sleep) together with Tony's total fatigue and general feeling of being unwell, have made this weekend quite depressing. (Our son Richard was away.)

That said, things are looking better tonight. Tony has been trying so hard to get out for walks so as to break the vicious circle of fatigue and lack of energy. However, he hasn't been having much success. Every time he takes a walk he has to go for a nap because he's exhausted. How far should he push himself? They say chemo patients should listen to their body, etc. But tonight... Tony asked me to help get him out of his "rut". And maybe, just maybe, that's just what I needed to get out of my own "rut".

We all went out to watch Richard play his first soccer game of the season (he scored 3 goals), and I think we all felt better for that brief interlude of normalcy. It's very difficult not to look back and think about how things used to be... and not feel sorry for all that can no longer be... for now, at least. But, if we are to get through this with our sanity intact, then we have to stop comparing today to yesterday and just appreciate what we have NOW. Hopefully, I will be up to the task.

Well, I hope I haven't been too depressing... But I am feeling much better - thank you! I hope you all had a great weekend...

Take good care!



big sister said...

I am sending all my support, I know the past few weeks have been awful and you have more treatment left to do but Renee you are staying so strong and focused and that feeds off to everyone. I love you. michele x

Anonymous said...

Bonjour à vous tous.
Vous avez été dans nos pensées Bravo pour la performance de Richard et pour votre courage à tous les deux.Ne lâchez pas.


linda said...

We are all behind you guys, in our hearts and minds.You are halfway through the treatments now and though it may not always feel like it, you are doing a great job. If you ever feel like going for a beer or two, call me.
All my love, Linda xoxo

nikki said...

Hi Renee, Tony and boys,
I just want to say that you are a terrific family. God Bless from Aunt Maureen and Uncle Michael